Mother Freak Out

Dear Mom,

Please do not leave a voice mail on my cell phone saying you will email if you’re not going to email. I waited for three days to get your email and nothing came. Then, you called me at work. You’ve never called me at work before – not in my entire life. Needless to say, my heart jumped into my throat and in the two seconds it took for the receptionist to transfer your call to my phone a dozen possibilities ran through my mind. Did dad’s prostate cancer come back? Did grandpa have a heart attack? Was J. in a car accident? Plus a bunch of others. And what did you call for? To see if I would like for you and dad to buy me a plane ticket to come visit this summer. Hell yeah, you can buy me a plane ticket! But did you have to give me a minor coronary event at the same time?

Sure, I could have emailed you, but you said you would email me. Sure, I could have given you a phone call, but I hate, hate, hate talking on the phone. Please, next time just leave a more detailed message or email me!



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